It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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