Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Randomize
