I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
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