sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize