When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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