Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
