so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
