Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize