They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
