operation harelip BJ is a go
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
