Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
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