I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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