Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
