he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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