I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
