It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
