it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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