if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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