Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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