After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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