i barfeds in our rink
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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