i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
