and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
