Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
