I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
