i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
