So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
