Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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