remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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