please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
