i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
that's an acceptable place to lick
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Randomize
