He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I touched a dick in church today
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