Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize