If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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