The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
