I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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