That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
This couple is walking their pig around campus
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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