C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
