Christians are straight up FREAKS
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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