we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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