you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Banned from zoo.
Again?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
smell my finger.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize