youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize