You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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