have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
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