it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
