your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
