He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
