I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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