i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
