Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
