we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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