yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize