So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
